I guessed,i was the quietest in class today.

i dont know why.

Right after school ended,

i just felt like rushing home.

I felt lethargic.

In the bus,

i reminded Lyna that im gonna be

11 months single in two days time.

which is on the 16 sept.

A flashback ran across my mind of the date 17.

All of a sudden,

memories went in my mind,

i felt inflitrated and distraught.

I thought that the belie ive been showing that ive moved on

far away, was wrong.

Perhaps, ive moved on.

its just hard to express and elaborate the feeling.

How Khairi vault in my life,

he made the impact on me till now.

I missed how i made him the most pivotal person,

as part of my life.

i felt agonized thinking how he'd drifted so fast.

like a thunder and lightning.

i felt dreaded on going through everyday.

i just hoped that i could at least bump into him.

I missed how he were everything i could asked for a guy.

Keeping me safe and let me lay by his chest,

was the sweetest thing ive gone through.

i swear.

The first time i knew him.

it was like an impossible dream to get him texting and calling

me every single day.

i missed those calls and messages.

all those that could made people around me thought

i was crazy.

As i would smile all along.

I felt all complete when i was with him.

Even though,

he made me feel down whenever he talked about his ex.

At times,

i felt like a beast to him.

Being so rough and disrespect him.

i still felt the regret right now.

how i wished i was much more grateful to have him,

past-time.

and he's right,

what he'd dislike,

dint brought me any good.

i thanked him for showering me with care and concern.

coz' im just a spoiled brat.

i admit.

But he,

was always there,

advising and nagging at my ears.

and all i knew, he was the

irritating bug.

how we fought and got into misunderstandings,

i loved them most.

he will always be the one who'll give in.

and made me laugh eventually.

Khairi,

you made those days of the 3 months ive known you,

wonderful and beautiful.

Even though ,

sometimes i thought you were the beast that broke my heart into pieces.

yeah,

i hate you when i called you for the last time.

i hate you big time.

But then,

the hatred that i felt wasnt strong enough

compared to the love i had once for you.

I dont know why,

i still felt the care and concern for him

im bewildered why i should ever think of his birthday.

hais.

what do he regard me as?

im dreaded to know.

and the fact now is,

i just have to go through everything ,

facing the fact he isnt there for me anymore.

yeah,

he's gone.

This post is for him.

but,

i aint sure whether he still reads my blog like he did ,

past-time.

i cant gurantee on that.

after 1 year ,

and all i think of was memories ive gone through with you.

it felt like it was yesterday when i got to hug you and that made me feel warm.

But to you; Khairi Sufrie,

i miss spending time with you and ya homies like i did,once.

coz' i enjoyed every single memories that ive gone through .

Even when i know that it will get me in serious trouble.

i thought i could get in love again after a heartbreak.

but no,

after you,

im not pretty sure how my love life would ever be.

nobody are just as special as you.

nothing that i can compare.

just nothing.

coz' you're one in a million.

and i miss you.

i really do.

is as though rememering a stranger you dont know.

:(

Don't Leave Me Alone In This Lonely World ;
♥ Missin YOU @ 11:37 PM

Happy 20th Birthday, Faisal.

The Proposal.

Kekadang, Allah sembunyikan matahari,petir dan kil...

Marina Barrage.

it cuts like a razorblade.

happy birthday, babe.

i miss you,

syarahan.

the race.

dead.